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An image shows Pleasanton residents Allen Larson and Heather Gioia’s Progress Pride flag after someone tore it down the previous night on June 11. (Photo courtesy of Gioia)

It was late at night when Allen Larson and Heather Gioia heard a loud bang coming from outside their house in Pleasanton. When Larson went outside to see what happened, he was surprised to see their Progress Pride flag ripped from their flagpole.

“The idea that somebody would be offended by a symbol of inclusion and love is kind of baffling to me,” Larson told the Weekly. “It is a sad statement that somehow this flag was an offense to this individual.”

And while the two decided not to pursue charges against the culprit, the two wanted it to be clear that they will not be intimidated and that Pride flags are a way to show solidarity to a group of disenfranchised people during difficult times.

“We originally hung the flag to celebrate the people we love — friends, family, and chosen family who identify as LGBTQIA+,” Gioia told the Weekly. “It wasn’t meant to be a grand statement, just a visible way to say: we’re so happy to have you in our lives.”

“But when someone ripped it down — violently, loudly, and in front of witnesses — it became clear that even a simple act of kindness and visibility can provoke hatred,” she added. “That wasn’t just vandalism. That was a message meant to intimidate.”

The incident started around 10:30 p.m. on June 11.

Larson said he was sitting on the couch when he and Gioia heard the loud noise outside their home. 

When he walked outside, a man — the only witness who saw what happened — approached Larson and handed him the Progress Pride flag before pointing to another man who he said he saw tear down the flag before running away.

“He said the guy was walking away and he just ripped this thing off and just took off down the street,” Larson said. “I looked down the street and sure enough, I saw someone running away.”

Larson said the culprit had yanked on the flag so hard that it broke the metal bracket base that the pole was in which, according to him, meant that whoever did it seemed to have been really filled with anger.

Gioia said the following morning, she and Larson filed an incident report with the Pleasanton Police Department before they taped the flag back up. Larson said they filed the incident report so that police could track any other similar cases if they do happen.

PPD Lt. Nicholas Albert told the Weekly that because a formal crime report was not filed — and without any security footage available — the department is not investigating further into this incident.

Albert added that if a similar incident occurred and a formal report was made, a suspect could be potentially charged with vandalism and, depending on the suspect’s intent or motive, an additional hate crime related to property damage charge.

The following day, Gioia decided to post the incident on Nextdoor with some hope that a few of her neighbors would offer to hang their own flags up as a sign for solidarity.

“Some were supportive. Others insisted only American flags should be flown,” Gioia said of the responses to her post. “And some were openly hostile to the idea of Pride flags at all.”

Apart from putting up the Progress Pride flag that was torn down, Heather Gioia decided paint her steps as a way to continue showing solidarity to the LGBTQIA+ community during Pride month. (Photo courtesy of Gioia)

But some of the messages she said stuck with her the most were the ones from people who were too afraid to fly their Pride flags.

Comments like “I wanted to hang a flag, but I’m scared,” or “I’m afraid my kid will be targeted,” were just some of the examples that Gioia said she saw on her post. 

However, Gioia said there were others commenting why not fly a heterosexual flag, to which Gioia noted that being straight was never illegal or that straight people were never alienated to the extent that LGBTQIA+ people were and sometimes continue to be to this day.

“Pride doesn’t exist because LGBTQIA+ people want special treatment,” Gioia said. “Pride exists because they’ve been denied basic dignity for too long. Pride exists because they still have to fight for what others take for granted.”

But that hasn’t stopped others from disagreeing with what the Pride flag stands for.

This also isn’t the first time that Larson said they have had to deal with this type of vandalism.

He said someone had attempted to tear down their Pride flag last year too — that time the person was only able to bend their flagpole — and added that seeing this happen back-to-back years is unfortunate.

According to the Human Right Campaign, one of the largest LGBTQIA+ political lobbying organizations in the U.S., the Progress Pride flag that Gioia and Larson have at their home was created by Daniel Quasar, an American artist and graphic designer. The flag includes a “white, pink, and light blue stripe to represent the Trans community.” It also includes black and brown stripes to represent communities of color — the black stripe is also a nod to the thousands of individuals who died during the HIV and AIDS crisis in the ’80s and ’90s.

For Larson and Gioia, they said the flag is a symbol for safety and acceptance.

“To the guy that pulled it down, I feel bad for him that he doesn’t understand that this is about love and acceptance,” Larson said. 

Larson also explained that he believes in communication and freedom to express different views, which is why he said he doesn’t believe in knocking Make America Great Again hats off of people or tearing down flags that support President Donald Trump.

He said he believes there are always going to be individuals who don’t agree with what others believe but when it comes to things like LGBTQIA+ rights, he is seeing some become more brazen in their actions against that community due to national rhetoric that unjustly blames issues on groups such as immigrants, trans people and other disenfranchised people.

Larson said that ultimately, the reason why they didn’t press any destruction of property charges is because he would prefer having a conversation with the person who tore the flag. 

After someone tore their Progress Pride flag, Allen Larson and Heather Gioia decided to put it back up to show they will not be intimidated from displaying the flag. (Photo courtesy of Gioia)

“I want to know them. I want to know why. I want to know what kind of background or belief system makes this such an ugly thing,” Larson said.

And while he said he does forgive the person who did this, he wanted to make it clear that they will not stop supporting the LGBTQIA+ community.

In response to her flag being torn down, Gioia decided to take it a step further and in addition to hanging her flag up again, she painted the phrase “Hate Has No Home Here. Love All” in rainbow colors on her front steps.

“It’s for everyone who’s ever felt unsafe in this town. For every kid wondering if there’s a future for them. For anyone who’s felt unseen, unwelcome, or unloved,” she said. “And yes, it’s also a message to the man who tore it down — because I want him to know: We’re not backing down.”

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Christian Trujano is a staff reporter for Embarcadero Media's East Bay Division, the Pleasanton Weekly. He returned to the company in May 2022 after having interned for the Palo Alto Weekly in 2019. Christian...

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